Here the child reacts to stimuli in its environment. Already in the first days of life, the newborn is confronted with many new experiences and challenges: The baby experiences a lot of new stimuli, such as visits to the puerperium or sounds from the radio and television. At best, there are also unspoken partnership problems that the little one feels. All of this irritates the babies and causes them to be restless, unable to find sleep and ultimately crying a lot. Warning: resonance crying is often interpreted as crying for need. Accordingly, the concerned parents can no longer find their own peace. The result is fear, despair for parents and child, and thus a vicious cycle. Many parents do not feel understood and then seek help. The result is that they are put off by professional helpers, arguing that shouting is a temporary development phenomenon ("three-month colic"), or they are considered to be incompetent and complicated. However, a solution is not found.

This crying often shows up as excessive or unspecific screaming and puts a heavy burden on the parents. Such a crying fit hides memories of what babies experienced during pregnancy and birth and process in dreams. The understanding of the prenatal world of experience can be awakened and brought closer to the parents. This creates recognition for the child's way of expression. The memory crying can also be triggered by a sound, a hasty or surprising movement, a color or a smell, so that the babies start to cry for no apparent reason. Here they need our presence and attention. What do the parents struggle with while crying? Loss of orientation ("I don't understand it!").

Not all parents are able to always provide their children with the experience of security and attachment, so that they can build a secure attachment.

In both unsafe models, children get used to organizing the relationship with their parents in their own way. In the anxiously ambivalent model, the attachment figure is depicted as unpredictable. Due to the inconsistent availability, the children do not know what to expect. They often hear threats of abandonment - they are highly pathogenic!

Attachment-related issues of the attachment figure (traumatic unprocessed events) keep the own attachment system activated. They are scary, confusing, troubling, messy. This means that their care options, especially their function as sensitive attachment persons, are only available to a limited extent. The babies often start to cry and hardly develop a rhythm of sleep - or they are quiet and calm. You have already perceived the unpredictability intrauterine.

Children with an insecure-avoiding attachment style have "weaned themselves off" to seek help from their caregivers in emergency situations. They have had to learn that they do not receive help in emotional need, but are rather devalued instead. Therefore, they avoid further rejections by showing themselves 'cool' (even if they are highly aroused inside) and asking for no more support.

On the other hand, children who are tied to uncertainty and ambivalence try to ensure that the attachment figures are close by crying violently and clinging to them. They do this because their learning experience is that they only have a chance of consolation and attention if they present their needs as intensely and dramatically as possible.

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